Tuesday, April 20, 2010

'Glu - Lam Humor'

We were building a cabin on Nancy Lake in the late 90's. The site wasn't road accessible so we had to take all of our material by boat to the shoreline and haul it up a steep hill to the building site.
I had hired two young fellows to carry the materials up the hill which was quite a task. When I got to the site to start building, I noticed two 5 1/8" x 12" Glue Laminated beams still at the waters edge. Instantly I new what had happend. The boys found the beams to be too heavy. True, they were 18' long and they were heavy, but I figured they could have carried them with a little effort. OK, a lot of effort.
I called them on the cell phone to ask why they hadn't taken the beams up the hill, I got the answer I had anticipated. " Those beams were just too heavy". I wasn't thrilled about it but I knew I was going to have to take the beams myself if they were going to get up there.
I hoisted the first beam on my shoulder and slowly started trudging up the hill. Wow, this beam was even heavier than I thought. By the time I got to the top of the hill I was breathing harder than if I had attempted a four minute mile. It seemed like my mouth wasn't quite big enough to take large enough breaths. One down and one to go.
On the second beam I went a little slower but the same problem arose at the top of the hill: I just couldn't catch my breath. Finally, both of the beams were at the top of the hill and I was quite proud of myself and I called the boys and told them that I took the beams myself just to rub it in a little.
Later that night when I got home, Gwen, my wife wanted me to hear a message she received on her cell phone. "You want to explain this?" she asked. The message started out with extremely heavy breathing and continued with heavy breathing for a minute or two which seemed a little long for an obscene phone call. Then it hit me.
I had accidentally hit the cell phone recall button in my pocket while hauling the beams and had called her phone and left a message. She looked at me after I explained and said one word sardonically. "Sure"

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
- Oscar Wilde

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